Tuesday, January 29, 2008

News Blackout -- A Rant

It happens every election cycle. No matter what my intentions, I will eventually be overcome by Pre-Election Stress Disorder (PESD-- pronounced pissed.) Watching people slowly rip each other apart, live and in color, is too much for me. When I can't take it anymore, I turn off the TV. My self-imposed blackout period usually comes much closer to November. How will a political sissy possibly make it through the next 10+ months? Well, much like the states that started the primary season early, I'm implementing the blackout now. (Anyone ever hear the Frank Zappa song on the subject of tv?)

This early onset PESD actually started before the primaries. I got the crap scared out of me when the president of Iran came to lecture at Columbia. A few years, I had an Iranian student who lost her uncle to this government. He wasn't of the same faith as the dictators. So, I was already clear that this man was a murderer. Then, he said something like, "...there aren't any gay people in Iran..."

I started screaming at the TV, "What the F*&% did you do with them you b*&%$#$d???????????"

We watched the lecture during school, and my kids just laughed at him. (They already knew Mommy has a potty mouth.) What kind of fool would believe that stuff," they asked?

"Me." No doubt Hitler said the same thing while setting up the death camps. All of these hate peddlers play for keeps.

But that's not why the blackout has come early. My big problem started about a week ago with a horrible nightmare. In it, I was visiting a church. I went into the church library and found row after row of Nazi propaganda and memorabilia. These people weren't the Lutherans, I realized. They were stinking Nazis! I ran around the church and out in the street screaming for someone to come and see. No one came. (Yes, I have Nazi fear, German fear, and Lutheran fear, but that's another story. Sorry German and Lutheran guys. It's me not you.) Since then, I've had recurring dreams about all kinds of scary people doing terrible things. A nightmare government took my kids away because they're home schooled. Then there was a whole Fahrenheit 451 thing with my home library. Another time some unknown police force killed a favorite cousin who, in real life, actually died of AIDS more than 16 years ago.

So back to my PESD. This last nightmare was after the whole "Do people vote by gender/race" thing started. Seeing both a woman and an African-American as serious possibilities for the job of president should be a happy thing, yes? Noooooooooooo. There are honest questions like who's best for the economy? Who will care for wounded veterans and those too poor for health care. Who will fight for marriage rights and keep us safe from the uber-crazy? Then there's this other stuff. Who's running a fair campaign? Are there two, or even more, Americas?

Is anyone going to talk about funding for science research? Who really will do the best for the country? Maybe it's just the PESD talking, but really y'all... a person's race or gender? It's 2008, damn it. Can you believe news reporters are actually talking about whether America is ready for a woman in the White House or a really old person? To quote Willow in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "We've already deja'ed this vu." And just so you know if you're really young, there are tons of female, soon to be senior citizen, baby boomers out there. If somebody doesn't put us all to work, we're just going to drift into useless clumps like a bunch of dust bunnies. Nobody really wants that. I don't have a candidate or a party to promote. I just think that we should be able to rejoice over the diversity of choices this year instead of going all Jim Crow/Pre-Women's Suffrage/Generation Gap. Oh, and I don't want the federal government to build a fence around the south boarder of Texas. If we want a fence, we can build it ourselves.

Now that the PESD has kicked in, I'll have to get my information out of the newspaper but it's for the best. I can't be fighting the fascists all night in my dreams for another 10 months. Morgan has been reading lots of Emma Goldman and advocates anarchy. She plans to vote in the primary and general election but hasn't even chosen a party much less a candidate. She and her dad are immune to PESD. If anything, they're watching more TV political coverage.

Lord help us.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

I'm Not Quite Dead... I think .... I'll go for a walk ....

As my health has been steadily declining, I've had that line from the Holy Grail going through my head. I don't seem to be up for blogging, but I'm here. I have an appointment with the rheumatologist today, and I'm praying she will take me off the methotrexate. It makes me so sick plus has put my immune system in the dumper. Evidently there's a newish adenovirus which has mutated from a mildly annoying cold into this uber-cold very nasty pneumonia causing thing. I've been on three different antibiotics, and I'm still fighting to get over this crap. The doctor said many patients are ill for 12 weeks or more. Much of this depends, they assume, on how quickly the patient sought treatment. And no, I didn't seek treatment immediately since I was already on antibiotics for a sinus infection. I finally figured out there was something more going on when the pneumonia set in. Want to really see a doctor freak out? Go in with a case of pneumonia when you've already been on Cipro for two weeks.

Anyway, I've heard some really good things about Embrel from my gyn (who has RA) and I'm planning to beg the rhumy to make the change. It's about a 20 mile drive to downtown Houston, and the last time I was there I waited three hours to see the doctor. I hope it's worth it.

May not be blogging much as the plague seems to be keeping me pretty busy.